Literature

Wolf Visit

Out in the mountains of Southeastern Arizona, we camp along a vast open meadow ready so see the wolves. We had just arrived and put up the tent. Out among the trees, when I looked for a tent site I had felt it already: an excitement, an alive-ness, a presence so unlike any other. “They have been here recently!” my instincts were telling me. Now I am fully present and awake, jolted back into my life. I feel somebody watching me and look around.
My gaze falls upon the first one, on the other side of the little dirt road dissecting the otherwise pristine mountaintop.
When the second one appears and the first one moves away with its dancing gait, I know for sure what I had felt in my body earlier. They are Mexican Wolves, curious to see who is camped on their mountain, checking us out unafraid and unperturbed. Two more come down the slope. Equally alert and present, they take a peek at us and dance on towards the barbwire fence dividing the meadow in two halves. It is the whole pack, I later learn, a family unit out together, hunting or returning to their den.
Tears roll down my cheeks and I feel deep joy. To see them unencumbered and free safe for their radio collars makes my heart sing.  Just to know that they are there is enough. It fills the whole mountain with life. I grab my pencil and paper and these words keep dancing in:

Wolf Blessing

You come to me unexpectedly
Out of the blue
When I am unsuspecting
Of the blessing that is awaiting me

I stumble for the camera
But it is futile
You are not to be filmed this time
Your appearance if for one set of eyes only

 

Awe fills my being
I cry: “I love you, I want you to stay”
It all comes from my core
Unpremeditated and innocent

Tears of joy and recognition
Fill my eyes and I weep
For your beauty has returned
To the space that was empty

Void of your essence, your being-ness
Bare mountaintop
Without your howls to fill its yearning
For completeness and peace

You dance towards the fence
Away from our human presence
With that gait which is yours truly
Going through life an artist

Of hunting and prowling
Playing and stalking
Rearing pups and frolicking
Taking down your food as a team

My heart is wide open now
Its gaze is following your silhouettes
I cannot discern the cumbersome collars
Wrapped around your slender necks

You take the fence in stride
The Houdinis of the wide-open range
Dancing through barbwire
Like it was invisible mesh

When you are out of sight
I continue weeping with joy
And behold the blessing of your visit
To make it a keep save for my life.

 

The crossing

I drive down the dirt road with the afternoon sun in my face, slowly scanning the scenery for elk when I catch something out of the corner of my eye and when I feel something deep in my veins. It is a shadow to the right of me and I stop the car just in time to see this beautiful, multicolored, long legged and tall wolf with a healthy mop of fur. It sees me, too, makes a little jump and crosses the road with lightning speed to disappear between the trees on the other side. But we lock eyes for a split second and I know for sure, deep down where everything is whole and connected that I shared a moment with a truly remarkable presence. I pull the car forward a bit to see the animal from behind, now walking slowly and leisurely with its trademark dancing gait. All too soon the trees swallow it up. I am alone again,

 

WOLF SONG

I am in your territory
Ancient ones hunting
With your instincts still intact
You run and find that which is weak.

I follow you down the path
Behind you I come up panting
My rhythm falling into synch
With your beating hearts.

Around the bend the mountain
Still, wise and strong
Watching us speed past
One instant and we are gone.

Past the mountain the lake
Dragonflies hovering
The tall cattails
Waving in the wind.

The lame deer is watching
Motionless at first then
Taking off towards the meadow
Its transition imminent in its surrender.

You take it down
In an act of mercy,
Its blood in your blood lives on
In all eternity, eyes wide open.

All is one I understand
In bones and flesh
Flying high above the scene
My soul loose and free.

I blink and you are gone
Like you have been for decades
Taken out of the chain of life
Your energy still lingers for me to find.

 

THE RETURN OF THE LOBO

I see you running again
Alongside the thriving herds
Checking them for weakness
And slow gait.

She envisions you denning
In complete safety and calmness
Rearing your pups with the
Intense care and joy that is yours.

He paints the picture of you
Howling to let other packs know
Where you are in the web
Of interconnected life.

They hold you in their hearts
Protected in the woods
Teeming with ungulates
Your preferred sustenance.

We read about you in books
Praising your life and telling
Your story from the perspective
Of truth and integrity.

I feel you, always
In the inner core of my being
Where intuition and wholeness lie
Beckoning me to follow them.